22 January 2011

My Heart is a Chimera

I can't be perfect in everyone's eyes.That's the holy fact about me.Actually I don't even know why am I writing this.In fact, I don't have any particular thing to scribble.It's just the urge of writing has come uninvited.Words can't just stop lingering in my stuffed mind.Ready to come out while drilling the my head's wall.Ah I screwed up! No matter what, I'm just gonna finish this post in just one shot otherwise it'll just end up being trashed in the draft;left unwritten.

I am no saint.Instead, I am a sinner.I have such a vulnerable heart;fragile.I get mad,easily dictated by forbidden desires.I pet a monster,the ugly one in my heart.A monster which never wanna come out and not even listen to its master.They say we need to listen to your heart as it's the sixth invincible sense in one's life.But heart can be somewhat a cheater to its keeper especially when it comes to doing err a bad deed.I realize my heart is not easy to be tamed.It roars when not getting anything it wants.

15 January 2011

When Someone Hits You From The First Sight

Love happens to everyone.Now it's crashing me hard through my rib.The crush hits me hard straight through the heart.But this is the most bizarre case you would have ever known cos I'm liking someone whom I never talked to so far since I'm still new in her friendship circle.I tried hard to find any comfy things which we can talk bout but hell it'll just end up my tongue tied hard between my teeth.Silly me,I'm too afraid to approach this girl cos I'm afraid that she might not like me.Well I realize that I'm not a good looking guy who will make every girl melt down once I pass by.No,I'm not in that category.I got too many flaws.This is bad man.How long can I keep hiding this feeling towards her?

I couldn't find any better way to approach her.When can I gather all my courage that I have to confront her? Not telling her of how I feel about her but I just wanna crack the nutshell.I wanna get to know her really well first.But shit,I didn't even have the balls to do that.I'm screwed up.I guess only time will tell and clearly if I snooze I will definitely lose.Simple enough.

Let's just hope I can assemble all the guts I own to go to her and tell how much I like this girl.

13 January 2011

Hi Dik,Boleh Cakap Bahasa Melayu Tak?

All hail Malaysia.HAHA

Before I start writing further,let me be clear with all of you that this is gonna be an offensive post for some people.Do accept my advance apology haha.Wait why do I even apologize since this is my blog.Obviously,I have the full authority of it.This is yet another insignificant update where people won't waste their time to argue or attach any strings about it.Hell this blog belongs to me so I can do anything I want people!

Actually I wanna talk about something which distracts my academic career line the most.To be exact a compulsory subject which I have to take for a couple of semesters for my undergrad studies.This subject is clearly not required for a local English major student like me.It's not like I'm gonna pursue my bachelor years of studies in any foreign lands like the UK or Aussie.Wonder what the hell the subject is? It's called Bahasa Melayu Komunikatif! Frankly,I hate this subject.It's the most fucking boring subject which I have to learn for 2 hellish hours in a week (in the afternoon for that matter).

But please,don't get me wrong.It's not that I'm forgetting my own root as a Malay born guy whatsoever.I'm proud to be a Malay.No kidding.It's my identity as a citizen in this country.I can speak standard Malay language really fluent though I'm a Kelantanese born stud cos I know some of them might not be able to speak it fluently as we still can hear some Kelantanese slang when they utter the words.No offense! I used to be in this circle once back then when I started to speak like they say; "cakap KL". Now,even some of my best friends are still confused of where I came from when I start to utter the dialect.Alana once thought that I was from Johore!LOL.

10 January 2011

Internationalying



Wonder why I put that kind of title for my post this time?First,let me teach you how to say the word.it's inter-national-lying.Find the meaning on your own if you want but of course you won't find any haha.Fine,let's cut the crap cos it doesn't have any significance of it anyway.The thing is I'm gonna talk about my, well, so called new phase of life under a new canvas.Nay,it's not really that new.Just new.Oh my God what am I trying to say huh?lol. Right,I am now officially an undergraduate student in college.First year for that matter.Should I tell you of how good being an undergraduate student is?Should I?Sorry, I'm too lazy to write about it haha.

Like I have mentioned in a few of my previous posts before,I was gonna transferred into a new college.So here I am,in the new English-niche school.They say changes are great but what is so great about change? No, you tell me.So far I haven't feel anything about it.Whenever I bump into my friends in my former college,they would ask this; "hey how's your life in the new place?" then I was like,"fuck what should I answer them?I don't have any satisfying answer for that,really.I would just tell them that life has been treating me good in a new place.Well I got new friends,new learning environment etc.But, the truth is, I still can't adapt myself in this school yet.I still have difficulty to sleep,pretty awkward in class (particularly with girls)still thinking of my friends in my former college so on and so forth (ain't this sounds sentimental? lol)

03 January 2011

Life is Awesome

Words surely won't able describe of how grateful I am after given the chance by the Lord to breath the air for 20 years already.I can't really believe that I'm already 20 years old!Look people,look how time flies.No,it doesn't fly but it rockets.It's like a blink of an eye.I feel as if number envies me so much.That's why I'm aging so fast lol.Anyways since I am already 20 so I will try to act like one of course haha.Let's hope I'll be more mature and more independent.Thank you Allah.Alhamdulillah.

So yeah,Happy Birthday to myself.

01 January 2011

It Was 2010

2010
I left "my friends" I grew up
I made smart decisions and I made stupid ones
I fell in love or maybe I just tripped
 I moved on and I felt lost in a sea of people
I was ignored a lot
I was happy and I was overwhelmed
I said things that never have should left my mouth
I said things that deserved to be said
I messed up and I made up
I created memories
I cried a lot,but I probably laugh more
This year was humongous for me
I got hurt so much, but still
I have no regrets
That was my 2010.

Farewell 2010



Everyone seems busy wishing their family and friends happy new year,so I don't wanna miss the chance too though I have nothing to write about.Of course,no new resolutions required cos I never set one since then.For me,when new year comes, I will open the book where its pages are blank and I'm going to put words on them myself. The book is called opportunity and its first chapter is New Year's Day.Happy New Year everyone!